Non Verbal Indicators and Appraisals by Robert Phipps

If you want to lead, inspire, develop and co-ordinate your staff effectively, you must first be able to work out what each of them thinks and feels about their roles.

While more and more business leaders are recognising this and holding regular conversations with their team members, all too often these discussions are far from the open, honest, two-way feedback sessions they should be.

An ability to read and understand the non verbal indicators or body language is invaluable if managers want to find out what’s really going on behind their team members’ polite smiles.

Recently I sat in on some appraisals to observe and give feedback, here’s a typical example of what went on.

It is often said that in face-to-face communications regarding emotions, the words we speak actually account for less than 10% of the message that we convey, while body language accounts for more than half of our message (our tone of voice supposedly communicates the rest). Body language is important, and if your words say one thing but your body says another, the person you are speaking to is more likely to believe the message your body is communicating. Here's how to start using body language to improve your day-to-day communications and, more importantly, to improve your quality of life.

Flirting Body Language 

Whether we realise it or not we are communicating all the time. Irrespective of what our mouths are saying, our body language transmits our thoughts and feelings like a primal beacon. These signals are never more on display than when it comes to flirting!

Social gatherings are fascinating for watching body language -particularly when people are flirting with each other. It 's no surprise to learn that women are the masters of interpreting this secret code and can often be aware of a budding relationship long before her male counterparts have even realised the couple in question even know each other.

Reading and using sexual body language.

When ever I give a talk, seminar, lecture, I can guarantee that I'll be asked about three things that body language is crucial to and they are:

How to spot a liar, how to be more confident and how to flirt better.

Well here's a piece from my friend David DeAngelo onsexual body language. This one is for the guys, I'll add another for the ladies soon.

Attractive women know within SECONDS of seeing and/or interacting with you if you're a sexually aware, confident man.

And they make the SUBCONSCIOUS decision of whether or not you're a possible sexual partner within a maximum of a few minutes of interacting with you.

These subconscious decisions are made mostly on the basis of body language and voice tone.

And since we know that "Attraction Isn't A Choice", we can generalize the following:

1) If you don't know what types of body language communicate that you're one of these "sexy beast" guys, you're probably not doing the right things "by accident".

2) The words you say actually don't matter much. What matters is HOW you say them, both with your voice and with your body language.

3) It is possible to learn how to communicate that you're a "sexually aware, confident man" using your body language and voice tone.

Learning this skill will make attracting women MUCH easier.

Phrases and Sayings Related to Body Language


BEADY LITTLE EYES:
The pupils constrict when we are lying or being deceitful.

SHIFTY EYES:
The eyes avert the gaze of someone they're lying to, so shifting around looking at anything but the receiver of the lie.

SPARKLE IN THE EYES:
The pupils dilate when we are seeing something we like, so allowing more light to be reflected back.

OPENING UP TO YOU:A physically open gesture, uncrossed arms and legs allowing more of you to be emotionally vulnerable.

BITE YOUR LIP/TONGUE, LYING THROUGH YOUR TEETH, COVERING UP:
To stop you saying something inappropriate or lying you might bite your lip or cover your mouth as you tell the lie.

GUT FEELING, STOMACH CHURNING: A physical feeling in the stomach indicating a dislike or uncertainty.

CHIN UP, OUT, SHOULDERS BACK:
Often said to people feeling a bit down, by raising the chin up and out with the shoulders back it makes us feel more positive.

FEET ON THE GROUND, STAND ON OWN TWO FEET:
Refers back to the ancient Chinese custom of female foot binding, as those who had this done were usually Royalty and therefore could not or would not stand on their own two feet without causing pain.

STAND OFFISH:
When people stand a just little to far away from us for comfort.

KEEP YOUR DISTANCE:
When you don't want to someone get to close to you. 

PUSHY: Someone who invades the personal space of others would often be refered to as too pushy.

CLOSE, INTIMATE FRIENDS:
Allow one another into personal or intimate spacial zones.

PAIN IN THE NECK:
A physical gesture when something is not to our liking.

GET A GRIP ON YOURSELF:
We usually touch ourselves in times of stress 

UNDER THE THUMB:
Controlled by another person, referring back to ancient Rome when the thumb turned downwards would almost certainly indicate death.

THUMBS UP:
Generally a form of OK, Good or Yes but can mean all sorts of other things including insults

MAKES MY SKIN CREEP, CRAWL, GETS UNDER MY SKIN:
A physical sensation encountered when you are not comfortable in a particular persons company, conversation topic or tone. This is an expression mainly used by women, as women have been proven to be more sensitive to touch and are more aware of sensations than their male counterparts.

We've all heard that you only have five minutes to make a good first impression and here's some evidence of exactly how employers look at you when you turn up for that job interview.

A POOR handshake and tardiness are just two of the reasons why jobseekers are failing to impress potential employers in interviews and these are two things that relate directly back to your BODY LANGUAGE.

A survey by employment law firm, Peninsula Ireland found that: 

* 89% of employers make up their mind about applicants within the first five minutes of an interview. 

* 78% of employers admitted having made a bad recruitment decision. 

* 66% of employers admit rejecting applicants because of a bad first impression. 

The survey also found that Irish employers found candidates not wearing business attire was the most disliked aspect of interview behaviour. On the flipside, it showed 63% of Irish employers do not realise they can be taken to tribunal over interview discrimination. 

The top five “what not to dos” were: 

* Failure to wear business-like attire. 

* Lateness. 

* Interest in salary. 

* Lack of company knowledge. 

* A poor handshake.